Me In Hyrule What the Fudge!
by Birth of Venus
Summary: REUPLOADED! I was accadentally zapped into OOT! Now I have to follow the storyline with Link, Navi, and my idiodic fairy Twinkle!
1. Chapter 1

Yes it is I, Birth of Venus! So, Ever wonder what would happen, when I was trapped inside the game Ocarina of Time? Well, if you read my previous story, then you should know that it's not pretty. But, too bad! The insanity will ensue anyway! (But don't worry, it's not as insane and crazy as my last one) Anyway, enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own Legend of Zelda, though I wish I did…. Then I could throw Ruto in a fish fryer without getting sued.

**Chapter 1: I'M A FREAKIN KOKIRI!**

"Yeah, yeah, gotta awaken the two sages and sail around the sea like a chicken with my head cut off trying to find the shattered triforce pieces, big whoop." I sighed while fiddling with my gamecube controller. I was sitting in my room playing the Wind Waker…Again. And I was sailing the seas trying to find the volcanic island to find the power bracelets… Again. To save a sea filled land…AGAIN! "Ugh!" I threw the controller down. Don't get me wrong, Wind Waker is a fun game, but during my Zelda obsession, it was the only Zelda game I owned and it got a little old after a while. I sighed. "If only I had my old Nintendo 64. I could go crazy with Ocarina of Time."

Unfortunately, I gave it to my brother to sell at his school garage sale. I know what you're thinking: If you like the game that much, then why did you sell it? Well, because as awesome as OOT is, the money for the sale was going to the Middle East for Tsunami relief, and that's more important than my need for the most awesome game on earth. I ordered the Special Master Quest edition for Gamecube, but I'm getting impatient. I can't wait for it, let alone waiting until Christmas for Twilight Princess.

Oh, excuse my manners. (Even though I don't have many) My name is Catherine, and I'm 13 years old. I'm a complete anime freak, but when it comes to gaming, it's all about Zelda. Not even Inuyasha for ps2 could top them. (Doesn't take much to top the Inu. games though, cause I heard that they stink). And at the moment, I was annoyed at how bored I was with Wind Waker.

"Man, I wish I could just live in OOT, then I wouldn't have to worry about having an N64 to play it with. Suddenly, the OOT game on my dresser began to glow (Yeah, even though I gave away my N64, I still kept the game. Isn't that sad?) "What the?" I said while rubbing my eyes. Suddenly, a black holesh type…Thing appeared in front of it. And I was about to be sucked in towards it! "EEEK!" I grabbed onto my bed post while hanging on for dear life. I glared at my Sesshomaru plushie. "Cant you do anything except staring coldly at me!" I shrieked. Of course it didn't answer. Soon, I couldn't hold on anymore and let go and was sucked into the portal. My last thought was cursing Cosmo and Wanda if they Mistaken me for Timmy Turner.

"Saria, are you sure this girl is a Kokiri?" "Yeah, why wouldn't she be? She has a fairy, doesn't she?" "Yeah, but she's wearing….Purple… And I've never seen her face before either." "Maybe she lives on the outskirts or something" I moaned as I heard the voices. What the heck? Saria? That name sounded familiar, but I couldn't think clearly cause I had a pounding headache.

I slowly opened my eyes to see two faces peering over me. "Waaa!" I screamed as I quickly shot up. They both screamed as well and fell over. "What the fudge is wrong with you two!" I yelled as I got up. "What's wrong with us? What's wrong with you!" The boy shouted back. "We were only trying to see if you were alright!" "Huh?" Is said as I studied the two kids more. The boy had a green shirt and a strange sort of skirt thing on. He also had a cap on that reminded me of the Keebler elves. The other was a girl with short green hair. She also had a green shirt and a short brown skirt.

Then suddenly realization hit me like a deku nut. Wait. I was hit by a deku nut. I turned around and saw a bratty kid throw one at me. "Why you little snot rag!" I yelled as I chased after the kid. **_The following scene has been removed from this fic due to explicit violence, coarse language, and the constant beating over the head with a stick. Thank you, and have a nice day. _**

I sighed contentedly as I walked away from the beaten form of the snot rag while wiping of my hands. The kids looked fearfully at me and backed away. "Anyway," I said " I know who you two are! Saria," I pointed at the girl "And Link," I pointed at the boy. Link raised an eyebrow. "Guess you're right, Saria. She must be a kokiri to know our names. "Yeah, and… What do mean? I'm not a kokiri!" I yelled. "Uh, yes you are." Saria said. "Just take a look at yourself!" She pointed to a stream nearby. I walked over and stared at my reflection. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" I screamed. And I had a right to scream too. I WAS A FREAKIN KOKIRI!

I was 10 years old, and had long brown hair tied into a French braid, unlike regular kokiri, I had a violent shirt with long sleeves. But I also had a green skirt a little longer than Saria, just a little above my knees. "What the fudge!" I yelled. Not only am I in OOT, but I'm also a shrimp! Link and Saria just continued to stare at me strangely.

"Wait a second." I thought to myself. Was it because I made that wish to be in OOT that I got zapped here? It must be! But I didn't mean it, as cool as it is! **_The first moral of the fic: Be careful what you wish for! _**Hey! Get out of here! I don't want no morals! **_Well, excuse me! I was only trying to get the readers to think about the story! _**They don't need to think about it! It's a fanfic! What's to think about! And what was with blocking out my beating up of that kokiri kid? **_I told you, it held explicit violence and _**

**_Coarse language! _** Oh please! I beat him over the head with a stick and called him a snot rag! **_Fine! I can tell I'm not wanted! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! (Runs away crying) _**

Link and Saria just continued to stare. Finally, Link broke the long silence. "Whatever. I'm going to see the Great Deku Tree now. And he started to walk away. "Hey, wait!" I ran after him. "Can I go see the Deku Tree with you?" I thought that maybe the great and wise Deku Tree would be able to get me home. Link raised an eyebrow. "And have you, Ms. Crazy, drive me insane? No way!" I pouted. "Hey, first of all, my name is not Ms. Crazy, its Catherine! And also, I'll be good, I promise! PWEEEEEEEEEEZZZZZ!" "Ah, fine! Just stop whining!" Link said while inserting his fingers in his ears. Heh. The big whine. Works every time. "Yay! I yelled as I followed Link."

Suddenly a green fairy popped flew out of my shirt. "Eeek!" I yelled and jumped back. "You really need to stop screaming." Link said in an annoyed tone. "Hi!" The fairy said in a high pitched squeal. "My name is Twinkle, and I'm your guardian fairy!" "Uh, Twinkle?" I said. "I have a fairy named Twinkle?...Great." Then another fairy flew out of Link's cap. "Hi, Twinkle! I'm Navi!" Ah! No! Two annoying fairies! This was getting insane. "Hey, I told you to stay in my hat and stop bugging me!" Link said as he stuffed Navi in his cap.

"Anywaaaay…. Moving on." I said as I walked towards Mido, who was guarding the entrance to the Great Deku Tree. "Hey, how did you, Mr. No-Fairy, get a shield and a sword!" "Shut up Mido and let me through." Link said with impatience in his voice. "Even if you got the weapons to defend yourself, I'm not letting you through and there's nothing that you can do about it!" Mido huffed and crossed his arms. "Let me take care of this," I said and stepped in front of Mido. I grabbed the nearest stick and started beating over the head with it over and over and over and over and over and over and over again. "OWWWW! OK, OK, YOU CAN PASS! JUST STOP IT!" Mido shouted. "Thank you, here have a cookie," I said and dropped a raisin oatmeal cookie on his head as Link and I walked past him.

Link was laughing so much he was beginning to scare me. And believe me, that's hard to do. "That was awesome!" Link panted wiping tears of mirth from his eyes. But we were interrupted when a boko baba (I think that's what they're called) sprung up and lunged its neck at us. Shoot, I didn't have a weapon! But Link took care of it by slashing it to bits with his sword. "WOW, THAT WAS GREAT!" Sprinkle shouted and flying around in circles. "Yeeeaaah….Whatever, Sprinkle." I said. "We're almost there, come on!" Link yelled walking ahead. "Hey, wait up!" I shouted while running after him.

I caught up to him and stared up at the Great Deku Tree. "Wow, that's a big tree…." I mumbled to myself. Navi flew out of Link's cap and flew towards the Deku Tree. "Great Deku Tree, I'm back!" "Ahem!" Link and I both exclaimed. " Oh yeah, and I brought Link and Catherine with me too." Navi mumbled. "Why is this…..Catherine here?" The Deku Tree said. (Sorry, I didn't feel like doing the Deku Tree's accent.) "Uh, Mr. Deku Tree….Sir?" I said stepping up to him. "Um, I'm from a different world and I kinda need to get home. Can you help me? The Deku Tree thought for a bit. "Child, it is obvious that you are here for a reason. Therefore, you shall assist young Link in his quest." I nodded nervously. "Uh, Ok."

"Link, Catherine, I need you to break a curse that was placed on me. I fear I have little time left. Then a gaping hole appeared in the Deku Tree. "Uh, wait, I don't have any weapons!" I exclaimed. "Oh, right, sorry." The Deku Tree laughed nervously. "Here."

"A kokiri shield and sword floated into my hands" "Well, thanks." I said. "Ready?" Link said. I nodded and we both ran into the inside of the Great Deku tree.

BoV-So what did you think? Was it good? Bad? Or just plain wrong? R&R and tell me! And yes, I really did sell my N64. But the money was for a good cause, right?...RIGHT?

Link- But why did you keep the game?

BoV- Cause I'm obbessed. (Cackles)

Link- 00


	2. Chapter 2: Inside the Deku Tree

BoV- Man, I like this story so much, I'm startin the next chappie right away! So fun!

Link- Will there being any more beatings on Mido?

BoV- Maybe later. But not in this chappie.

Link- Awwww…. (Looks disappointed)

Inuyasha- Get over it, you whining baby!

BoV- Hey, Inu, be nice! And what are you doing here anyway? This is a Zelda story!

Inuyasha- I want ramen!

BoV- But I don't have any!

Inuyasha- Well, I'm not leaving until I get some!

BoV- Great… --; Link, please do the disclaimers.

Link- Birth of Venus does not own OOT. Thank God.

**Chapter 2: Inside the Deku Tree (and allergy problems)**

Link, Navi, Twinkle, and I all entered the Deku Tree and the first thing we saw was all the cobwebs that decorated the place. "Man, Treebeard needs to do some dusting off in here. " Everyone looked at me strangely. "Who's Treebeard?" asked Link. "Never mind," I said and walked forward. "Ah…Ah….AHCHOOOOOOOOO!" Twinkle sneezed so hard it shook the whole tree and awakened the boko babas. "You idiotic knat!" I yelled. "What's wrong with you!" "Sorry," Twinkle sniffled. "I'm allergic to cobwebs." "How can a fairy have allergies!" I shouted really loud. "Would you two stop arguing and help me take care of these stupid plant things!" Link shouted while killing one of them.

"Sorry," I said while slashing the one in front of a ladder. "Just like pulling weeds" I muttered to myself. "Well, aren't you coming?" I asked him as I started climbing up the ladder. "Uh, yeah, hang on." Link said while trying to bring his foot from the cobwebs he stepped in. I rolled my eyes and began to climb up the ladder myself. Link soon caught up with me as I was shuffling through the chest that had the compass. "Happy birthday," I said while tossing the compass to Link. "ACHOOOO!" Twinkle sneezed that shook one of the skullutas from its perch and made a new one on top of my head. "Aaaaa! Get it off me, get it off me!" I yelled and started running around in circles.

I managed to get it off me and I took out my sword and started stabbing it repeatedly until I was sure it was dead. Then I turned on Twinkle with rage in my eyes. "IF YOU MANAGE TO GET SOMETHING LIKE THAT ONE MORE TIME," I pointed to the dead Skulluta, "YOU'RE GONNA END UP LIKE HIM, GOT IT!" Twinkle nodded fearfully. "Y-yeah, got it," she said in a quivering voice. "Good then let's go." I said striding to the nearest door. "Um, shouldn't we be climbing up these vines first?" Link asked pointing up to them.

"If you wanna get knocked down by those skullutas, be my guest," I said. "Good point," Link said running after me. We went through the door and came across a deku scrub. It shot a deku nut at us and hit me in the gut. "Damn," I swore while rubbing my stomach knowing I lost a bit of heart. "You okay?" Link asked while putting up his shield. "Just dandy," I said sarcastically as another nut bounced off of Link's shield. The nut hit the scrub dead on and it tried to get away.

"Oh, no you don't," I said running after him and grabbing him by the tuft. "What color is my underwear?" I asked threateningly. "Wha?" the scrub said fearfully. I slapped him across his…uh…face. "Where's Mr. Krabs, robot?" "WHAT!" The scrub shivered in fear. "Who's Mr. Krabs?" I slapped him across the face again. "Uh, Catherine, maybe you should ask about how to get through the dungeon?" "Nah, he has useless info." "ACHOO!" Twinkle sneezed causing a hunk of rotting wood to squash the scrub. I picked up the heart that restored my health. "Shall we move on?" I asked. Link nodded as we continued onward through the next door.

Link jumped across the platform and I tried to but it crashed to the ground. I glared up at Link. "Thanks a lot." I said. "Hey, don't get mad at me," He said. I climbed the ladder and hit him over the head with a stick. "Ow!" He yelped rubbing his head. I quickly handed the stick to Twinkle and pointed at her with an innocent look on my face. Link shook his head. "Forget it." He said and opened the chest nearby. The chest held to slingshots. Link smiled evilly and shot me in the head with it. "OW!" I felt a lump forming on my head. Link held the slingshot behind his back and began to whistle innocently. "BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER!" I yelled. "Aaaa!" Link yelled. "ACHOO!" Twinkle sneezed making the ladder above the entrance to the room fall down.

"Hey, waddya know, we can leave now." I said. I hopped down and climbed up the ladder with Link following with a scowl on his face. Back to where the skullutas were on the vines, we both took them down with our slingshots. Link started to climb and looked down to see that I wasn't following. "Hey, what's wrong?" He asked. "Well, uh…" I shuffled my feet uncomfortably. "I'm kinda… Uh… Afraid of heights." I said meekly. Link rolled his eyes. "We're not going that high." He said. "Yeah, but still…" I said. "Look, just climb!" He shouted. "Ok, Ok, fine!" I said and started to shimmy up the vines. Soon we found ourselves at the top of the Deku tree. (Look, I'm going to skip the room up here, ok?)

We circled around the floor until a giant skulluta fell down from the ceiling. We gasped in surprise but then Link made quick work of it. We both looked down to where the center of the bottom of the tree that was covered by webs. "Well, ready?" Link asked. "Not really," I said. Heck I wanted to do anything BUT jump. "Come on, it will be over before you know it!" Link said with an annoyed tone. "No!" I said and turned away with my arms crossed. "I won't jump! I'll take the long way down!" "ACHOO!" Twinkle sneezed. The sheer force sent me and Link off the edge and falling through the web and we landed in ice cold water.

"Ack! This water is freezing!" I exclaimed. "I'm lucky my evil swim coach isn't here or I'd be working my butt off in it!" Link gave me another odd look before looking around the room we were in. "Hey, look, a switch." He said while walking over to it. "Thanks for pointing that out, Captain Obvious." I growled. I was not in a good mood today. Link gave me a quick glare before pressing the switch which lit the torch.

"Ooh, ooh, I know what to do!" I shouted while running over to the torch and lighting it with my handy dandy hityouoverthehead stick. I ran over to the door on the other side and burned the cobwebs burning the door and letting us through. Link smirked. "Well, looks like you can't terrorize people with that thing anymore." "Huh?" I asked while looking down at my stick to see that it was nothing but a burned up match stick. "Awww…" I sighed and tossed it aside. "I was getting attached to it too." Navi flew out of Link's cap. "HEY! We gotta go save the Great Deku Tree! Enough horsing around"

"Uh, ok then." I said. "Let's go. Link nodded as we all went through the door. In this room, we saw a (Dun dun dun…..) Another deku scrub. We went through the ritual of blocking the nut with our shields and drawing it out. "Time to answer some questions, scrub," I exclaimed running after it, but Link got to it first. "Uh, I think I'll ask the questions, Catherine." "Fine," I pouted, "Be that way." Link rolled his eyes and turned to the scrub. "Now, do you know any helpful hints to get us through here?" "Ok, ok! But only a hint!" It sqeaked. "2-3-1, 23 is number 1!" Link looked puzzled. "Uh, ok." He said as he let go of the scrub who scampered away quickly.

"Ok that was easy, but how do we move on?" Link said looking at the bars on the door moving onward. "Simple," I said in a bored tone. I pulled out my slingshot and shot the eye thingy above the door and the bars lifted up letting us move on. "Like I said: Simple" I said with a smug smirk. "Oh shut up," Link said rolling his eyes. I glared at him and then enter the next room.

We came into a room with a floating platform and a spike covered rotating rolling pin thingy. "Yay, time to go swimming!" I squealed and dived into the water. Link stared ahead at me. "What the…" He muttered. Meanwhile, I was diving into the water and pressing the switch and lowered the water level allowing us to cross over. "Hurry!" I yelled pulling Link onto the platform so we could cross over. As the platform reached the other side, we saw Navi and Twinkle waiting impatiently on the other side. "Hey, what took you guys so long?" Navi asked. "Yeah, we ber waibing her bor a whileb." Twinkle said in a clogged up voice. We both glared at the fairies and moved the blocks. We killed the skulltulla and climbed up to the door.

A few rooms later, they were back in the room where they first dropped down in. "Great," Link muttered, " Looks like we'll have to use the block to move on." Link glared at the block and the torch not willing to solve another puzzle. "No need, Link." I said with an idea in my head. "Oh, Twinkle, come over here for a second," I said in a sickeningly sweet voice. "Yeah?" Twinkle said floating over. Suddenly I grabbed her and put her close to the webs covering the hole in the floor. "Ah…. AH…. ACHOOOOO!" She let out a mighty sneeze that instantly blew the webs away and the water below apart. Link looked amazed. "Wow, looks like your allergies actually came into use, Twinkle." " (achoo) Thanks." She said sniffling.

"What are we waiting for? Let's go!" I yelled jumping into the hole. "Hey, wait up" Link yelled jumping in after me. I looked at the three deku scrubs waiting for us. "Great, three deku scrubs are always better than one." I said sarcastically. "I'll take care of this," Link said as he swam out of the water. "Remember: 2-3-1!" I called out to him. But then he was already done with the easiest puzzle in the game before I could even get out the 3. "Wow, that was quick," I exclaimed. We both nodded to each other and entered the door to the final room of the dungeon.

"It's quiet… Too quiet. I have to fix that." I took a deep breath and screamed out: "HEYMRS.BOSSPERSONCOMEONOUTSOWECANKICKYOURASSANDGOONANDSAVETHERESTOFHYRULESOICANGOHOMEANDOBSESSOVERSESSHOMARUANDKENSHINANDSLEEPANDGOOFOFF!" Link, Navi, and Twinkle stared at me with wide eyes. "You were right, you're not crazy." Link said. I smiled at him. "Why thank you Link, I" "YOU'RE MEGA CRAZY! STAY AWAY FROM ME!" Link backed away.

All of a sudden we heard a loud roar. And all of a sudden, the big spideriy thingy Queen Gohma jumped down and glared its big angry eyes or EYE at us. "ACHOOO!" Twinkle sneezed that sent Gohma flying backward and in a daze. "Now's our chance, Catherine!" Link yelled and he charged at Gohma. I gave a huge battle cry and started slashing at Gohma with Link like there was no tomorrow. Gohma suddenly regained her senses and climbed up the wall and was ready to lay some ugly babies. But then Link shot her down with his slingshot and she fell in another daze. "DIE, VILE BEAST!" I yelled and slashed at it. Link just rolled his eyes and just was doing his own slashing. Until, Gohma gave a dying shriek and disappeared in a burst of flame.

"Well that was easy." I said and stretched" "Yeah, and the best part is that we saved the Deku Tree!" Link said happily. "Uh, heh, heh. Yeah, about that…" I said nervously. "Well, come on!" Link said pulling me into the blue shining light in the middle of the room. Navi flew towards the light, but it was fading fast. "Oh no! We'll be trapped in here!" Navi said in a panicked voice. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAACHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Twinkle sneezed so hard that it pushed her and Navi into the light and teleported then just in time.

6666666666666

BoV- And so ends our adventure into the Deku Tree and out again. And Twinkle actually proved useful with her allergies!

Link- We just read the chapter. You don't need to tell us again.

BoV- Hey! I was just trying to come up with a good conclusion!

Inuyasha- GIVE ME MY RAMEN NOW!

BoV- WHY WON'T YOU LEAVE ME ALONE!

Link- Anyway, r&r….If you feel like it. I don't care. In fact don't. This story sucks anyway.

BoV- LINK! (Brandishes stick)

Link-Ahhh! (Runs away)


	3. Chapter 3: We're off to see the Princess

BoV- Great. Just great. I'm getting braces. WHAAAAA! Well (Sniff) At least I can find comfort with my good friends Link and Inuyasha while I update.

Inuyasha- If you don't give me my ramen, I'll beat you over the head with a rubber chicken! (Brandishes chicken threatengly)

Link- Could you delete this story already? It's making me throw up in my mouth.

BoV- (Sarcastically) Gee, thanks. I knew I could count on you guys.

Inuyasha&Link- You're welcome.

BoV- I Anyway, I don't own OOT or any of the Zelda games. So sad, Isn't it:(

**Chapter 3: We're of to see the Princess, the Wonderful Princess of Hyrule **

Inside the Deku Tree's meadow, a bright sparkly blue light thingy appeared in front of the Deku Tree and as the light faded, me, Link, Navi, and Twinkle were standing in front of him. I shook my head and sat down. "Whoa, that was a joy ride," I said. "Link, Catherine, well done." The Deku Tree said in a raspy voice. "You have broken the curse upon me," Link smiled with pride. The little egomaniacal twit…(Ahem) Sorry. But I looked concerned. "You ok, Deku Tree? Need a cough drop?" I pulled one out. How I managed to get cough drops in Hyrule, I'll never find out. If the Deku Tree had a real mouth, he would probably give a weak smile. "Children, although you broke the curse, I'm afraid that my doom draws nigh anyway."

Link's face fell. "But we broke the curse didn't we? Wouldn't that have saved your life?" The Deku Tree sighed sadly. "Unfortunately Link, That is not so. For the curse has infected me for so long, I was doomed before you two even started," Twinkle shot out of my shirt angrily. "Then what was the point of sending us in there, then? I was so congested, I felt like my head was going to explode!" I grabbed Twinkle by one of her wings and whispered in her ear. "Now's not the time, knat."

The Deku Tree weakly laughed. "It is alright. The four of you deserve an explanation anyway. So let me tell you." "We're listening," Link said folding his arms. The Deku Tree coughed. "You might want to sit down. This is a long story." And indeed a long story it was. In fact, by the time the Deku Tree was done telling us about the goddesses and Ganondorf, I could barely keep my eyes open and the fairies were already snoring away. Link was the only one who was really paying any attention at all, because he was the only one who ever heard this story before. Oh yeah, and the fairies, but the reason they fell asleep was because they were just stupid.

"Link," The Deku Tree said in a strained voice "Take this emerald, the one that Ganondorf tried so hard to get. And go and see the princess of Hyrule." A big pretty shiny green light came from the Deku Tree and into Link's outstretched hands. When the light faded, it revealed………zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz…..Huh? Oh, sorry! It revealed the Kokiri Emerald! Yay! "You….Have….Done….Well…. Good….Bye…." The Deku Tree said in his final sentence before he slowly shriveled and died. I looked sadly at the Deku Tree. It was such a shame to see such a wise creature killed off by GanonDORK. As we slowly left the meadow, Navi stayed behind long enough to say "Goodbye, Great Deku Tree" Before she flew off to catch up with the rest of us.

Just as we were about to leave the path into the village we saw Mido blocking our way. "What did you do to the Great Deku Tree?" He demanded. "Oh, nothing, we just tried to save his wooden butt, but we were too late and he went bye bye." I said sadly. Mido looked angry. "So you KILLED him?" Link looked really angry and I wanted to punch him in the face. Link suddenly went up to him and kicked him in the place where the sun don't shine. "Ahhhh!" Mido crumpled to the ground in pain. "Awesome, Link! Let me help!" I shouted in glee and started punching him in the face while Link was constantly kicking him. Navi and Twinkle looked at each other and shrugged. "Might as well." Navi said. Twinkle nodded and they started sprinkling fairy dust (or salt, they called it fairy dust in Hyrule) all over his wounds. "GYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" Mido shouted in agony as we left him to his stinging and burning pain and misery.

The rest of the kokiri were alarmed by Mido's screams. One kokiri girl came up to us and asked what was going on. I cleared my throat. "You see, the poor boy stumbled upon a boko baba which, unfortunately besides causing terrible wounds, it also gave him more brain damage than usual. Therefore he has the delusional thought that WE attacked him instead of the boko baba. So, if he says anything about that, don't listen to him, he's only rambling." I smiled at her and we went off to the exit to the forest. The kid who guarded the entrance to the forest looked amazed at us. "You're not thinking of actually leaving, are you? Any kokiri who ventures out of the forest will automatically die!" I secretly gave him 5 rupees from behind my back. "But then again," the boy said singing a different tune, "You two look strong enough to handle yourselves on your own. He moved out of the way and let us pass.

In the little area with the bridge leading out of the forest, we saw Saria leaning against one of the supporting bridge ropes. "You're leaving the forest, aren't you?" She said in a sad voice. Link nodded sadly. Saria continued on. "I always knew that you would leave someday. Because you are different from me and my friends." I covered my mouth. "CoughHYLIANcough." Twinkle hit me over the head. "Quit it!" She whispered. Saria glared at me but continued. "But that's okay. Because we'll be friends forever…Won't we?" Link nodded. "Of course, Saria!" Saria dug into her pocket and pulled something out a pink ocarina and handed to Link. "I want you to have this ocarina. I hope you think about me whenever you play it, and come back to the forest to visit." Link took it. "Thanks Saria. I will." I pouted. "Hey! Don't I get a pretty ocarina? I WANNA OCARINA!" Link glared at me and hit me with his sling shot. "Owie… Meanie." Link turned towards Saria. "Goodbye, Saria we'll be back soon. Then we ran off with Saria looking sadly at our retreating figures.

When we came through the log, we suddenly keeled over and died. Ganondorf took over Hyrule, and the world was plunged into darkness.

THE END.

Ha-ha, just kidding. In reality, this is what happened: When we came out of the log, the bright sun shone on our faces. I hissed and covered my eyes with my arms. "The light, it BURNS!" Link rolled his eyes. "Meh, get over it, you big baby." I glared at him. "Well at least I don't go attacking people with my sling shot!" "That was because you interrupted my conversation with Saria!" Link shot back. Navi and Twinkle just floated there and watched the whole scene. "And, they're off at it again," Navi sighed. She turned to Twinkle. "Don't you think that this squabble is childish, Twinkle?...Twinkle?" Twinkle was floating there munching on some popcorn. (Don't know how she got that) "Yeah, Catherine! Use the stick!" Twinkle cheered. Navi rolled her eyes. "I'm surrounded." She mumbled.

Suddenly, a very scary hoot came from a tree branch above interrupting my argument with Link. "Well, HELLOOOOO there, children!" the talking owl named Kaepora Gaebora. I screamed and hid behind Link. He was shivering in fear himself. The fairies flew and hid into their respective owner's clothing. KP started his evil ramble. (I can't exactly remember what he said) By the time he was done, I was about ready to faint from fright and Link was even readier than I was. Also, I don't know about Link, but my fairy was shivering so much in my shirt, she would have been a great part of a massage chair. KP looked down at us. "Did you GEEEEET all that?" He asked. We both nodded vigorously hoping he would go away if we said yes. "Good, then I'll SEEEEEE you around!" And he flew away.

I sighed in relief. "Thank god THAT'S over." I said. Link nodded in agreement. "That was scarier than 20 Gohmas put together." "You said it," I agreed. We walked out of the alcove thing and into the open part of Hyrule Field. "Wow, this field is so big, we'll never reach the castle before nightfall!" I smiled all of a sudden and got an idea. "I know a way that will make our travels go by faster!" I shouted with glee. Link looked at me strangely. I suddenly linked my arm with Link's. (link arms with Link! Ha-Ha!) I pointed to the path ahead and broke into song as I skipped with him.

"Follow the dusty dirt road! Follow the dusty dirt road! Follow, follow, follow, follow, follow the dusty dirt road!" Link looked at me in absolute horror as I continued to drag him, skip, and sing. "Oooohhh…. We're off to see the princess, the wonderful princess of Hyrule! Because, because, because, because, because, BECAUSE! Because of the wonderful things she does!" The fairies flew out and added their little bit. "Doo, doo doo doo doo doo doo!" Then all of us except Link all sang. "WER'E OFF TO SEE THE PRINCESS, THE WONDERFUL PRINCESS OF HYRULE!" We skipped on and I turned to Link. "You see, Link? At this rate, we'll be at the castle way before nightfall!" Link rolled his eyes. "In case you haven't noticed, it's been nightfall for 3 hours now!" I stopped and looked up. Indeed, the moon was up high in the sky. And I looked to see how much ground we covered and saw we weren't even close to the castle. "Uhh… Hehehe.." I laughed nervously. "Well, let's stop for the night!" I said and shuffled through my backpack I never knew existed until now.

"YAY!" I yelled in excitement And pulled out a package of something. "Toaster Strudels!" Then, it began to rain Toaster Strudels. And Heaven shined down on me. And then… "Catherine? Catherine, wake up!" "Uhhh?" I slowly opened my eyes. "Link?" I sat up. I looked to see that it was morning and we standing in front of Hyrule Castle Town. I guess I was dreaming of Toaster Strudels again. And I found that I was munching on my shield in my sleep. How embarrassing. "Uh, anyway, lets go see the Princess!" I said nervously and ran inside. Link rolled his eyes and followed after me.

I wandered around the market place staring at everything. "Wow, Hyrule Market looks even busier in real life," I said amazed. I was so caught up in my looking around, I accidentally bumped into someone. "Oh, sorry," I said. "That's okay," The girl said. When I managed to get a closer look at the girl I recognized her. "Hey, you're Malon!" She smiled. "Wow, I must be more popular than I thought," Suddenly Link came running up behind me. "Hey, what's the big deal running off like that, huh?" He glared at me. Malon looked at me and Link. "Those are some strange clothes. Are you from the forest?" I shuffled my feet nervously. "Well, I guess you could say that…" Malon suddenly got excited. "Then you two are probably a fairy boy and girl, right?" I cringed at Malon's traditional weird nickname. "My name's Malon," she introduced to Link. "My dad owns Lon Lon Ranch." Link smiled. "Nice to meet you, Malon."

"My dad was supposed to be delivering milk at the castle, but I guess he fell asleep again." She laughed. "Yeeeeaaaah…." I said rubbing the back of my head. "Well, we gotta go, see ya, Malon!" I grabbed Link by the hand and dragged him up the path to Hyrule Castle.


	4. Chapter 4: A Meeting with Zelda

BoV- Well, it's me again! And I want to say thanks for the reviews!

Link- …. I LIKE CHICKENS!

BoV- (Stares at Link)

Link- (Starts to dance like an idiot)

BoV- Okay Link, I'm taking you to see a doctor. (Puts Link on a leash and drags him to the doctor's office) Inu, be a good puppy and take care of the disclaimers, please!

Inuyasha- HEY! I AM NOT A PUPPY! And BoV does not own OOT or any of the Zelda games.

Link- CHICKENS!

666666666666666666

A couple responses to reviews before I get started:

Evil Doughnut Man 2: Hey, don't worry. I'm as much an Inu fan as you are. I just heard that the games stink. But then again, I guess you can't always trust the evil critics. I wish I could try one, but I don't have a ps2. So sad, isn't it? Anyway, I'm glad you like the story.

Variabler: Thanks. I wish I didn't need to get them. That's why I'm going to the movies a lot this week, so I can enjoy popcorn while I still can. Anyway, thanks, glad you like the story!

Irken Gir: Sorry about that. I'm not exactly the most literate person, so I'm not good at telling the difference between accents and forms of speech. But it doesn't really make a difference to the story though.

666666666666666

**Chapter 4: A Meeting with Zelda and the agreement to kill GanonDORK**

We were both walking up to the castle gate when we heard the hoot that could send shivers down a professional wrestler's spine. KP appeared and we were extremely scared and blah blah blah, and then he left. Thank god. Then we went up to the castle gate. The guard peered down at us with distaste. "May I help you?" I pretended to put on a sad and suffering face and spoke in a sad and suffering British accent. "Please sir, our parents were recently killed from stalchild attacks, and we don't have enough rupees to pay for our stay in the orphanage. We decided to raise the money from selling Hyrule Scout cookies, and we need to see the princess to get our shipment." From above, Twinkle started to sprinkle fairy dust on me and made it look like freezing snow. I started to pretend to shiver uncontrollably. "Won't you please let us through, so we can sell our cookies and raise enough money for my puppy to have an operation?"

The guard raised an eyebrow. "I thought you said that you needed the rupees to pay for the orphanage." I realized my fumble and said nervously, (Still in my British accent, mind you) "Well, I need to pay for my puppies operation too." The guard crossed his arms. "Sorry, no can do. Besides, the princess isn't responsible for Hyrule Scout cookie shipments. You might want to check the Hyrule Scout meeting house" I dropped the pitiful orphan act and glared up at him. "I guarantee that you WILL suffer for this." Link suddenly stepped in. "Look, can we just see the princess? It's really important." The guard scoffed. "I don't think so. As if I'd let scrawny pipsqueaks like you see the princess. Now, BEAT IT!" I glared at him with deep hatred. "You're gonna pay for that! YOU'RE GONNA PAY!" Link laughed nervously and was dragging me away. "Ahehe….. Anyway, we have to go. Bye!"

Link dragged me away to the spot where the vines were growing. "Aw, crap." I muttered. "Looks like we're gonna have to sneak in." Link turned and saw Malon singing. "Hi, Malon!" He said cheerfully. Malon stopped her singing and smiled at Link. "Hi, Fairy Boy!" Link cringed at the nick name. "Are you going to the castle?" Link nodded. Malon's smile grew wider. "Then would you mind finding my dad? He must of fell asleep again." She laughed. "What a thing for an adult to do!" I looked at Malon and nodded. "Sure, Malon. We'll find that lazy bum of a father of yours." Malon giggled at that. "Thanks Fairy Girl! Here, take this egg! I've been incubating it for a while now." She pulled out an egg and handed it to me. "Uh, thanks." I found it weird that she would be carrying an egg around with her, but I shoved the thought away.

I turned to Link. "Okay, we're gonna have to use some awesome ninja sneaking skills to get past these guards." I paused to think. "No, wait, I'm thinking about Metal Gear Solid. These guards are so easy to sneak around you could move 5 feet around them and they wouldn't notice." Link stared at me. "What's Metal Gear Solid?" I rolled my eyes. "Never mind." I started to climb the vines. "You coming or what?" Links slowly nodded and followed after me. We dropped down from the arch thing and ran along the path. Link pointed out the guards ahead and we turned to the grassy area around the castle. We climbed the stone wall, went through the moat, and we ended up where Talon was sleeping. I kneeled down and poked him. "Man, this guy sure is a heavy sleeper."

Suddenly, my stomach started to growl as loud as a wolfos. I then realized that I haven't eaten since I found myself in the Kokiri Forest. "Man, I wish my Toaster Strudel dream would come true. I heard a wolfos howl in the backround and night slowly fell. I took no notice and I was staring at the egg in my pocket. I saw a couple sticks nearby. Link looked at me funny as I was going and picking up the sticks. "Uh, Catherine, what are you doing?" I sat down and started rubbing the sticks together really fast. "Making dinner." Link raised his eyebrow. "With what?" I looked up at him. "With the egg, what do you think?" Link looked at me strangely. "Don't we need that egg to wake Talon?" I answered casually. "Yeah." Link sighed. "And is there any way to wake him without the egg?" I turned back to my work. "Nope." Now Link was getting annoyed. "Then why are you cooking it?" I shrugged. "Cause I'm hungry." Link snatched the egg from me. "If we need this egg, then I won't let you eat it!"

I glared at him. "Link, give me that egg!"

"No."

"Yes."

"No!"

"Yes!"

"NO!"

"YES!"

"NOOOO!"

"YEEEEEES!"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

"YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!"

Then I tackled him. I started beating him over the head with my shield with one hand and was reaching for the egg with the other. Link on the other hand was keeping the egg out of my reach and using his sword to block a couple of the blows from my shield. This squabble went on for a few hours until we passed out from exhaustion. I slowly woke up when I heard a rooster crowing very loudly. I groaned without opening my eyes. I was so out of it, I didn't even question the warmth I was leaning against. Instead, I snuggled closer to the warmth. I didn't come to my senses until I heard the snapping of a picto box and the hysterical laughter of two annoying fairies. I opened my eyes to see that I was snuggled up against Link who unconsciously had an arm flopped down on top of me.

My eyes widened as a furious blush was creeping on my face and I opened my mouth wide and…… "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!"

My blood curdling shriek quickly woke Link up and he realized the position we were in. "GWAH!" He shouted and quickly scooted away from me. Navi and Twinkle were laughing even harder now. In a mad rush of rage I quickly slapped him across the face shouting "Pervert!" The fairies were laughing really, really, really, really, really hard now. Twinkle was able to stop laughing just long enough to say "You should talk Catherine, you were the one snuggling into him!" At this Navi and Twinkle burst into laughter again. I glared at Twinkle swatted her.

Meanwhile Link was holding the slap mark on his face. "What the heck just happened?" He asked. I glared at him and noticed that Talon didn't wake up yet. I stared at him. Man, that guy could sleep through an army of rampaging elephants. Still a little flushed from the chaotic event a few minutes ago, I picked up the cucoo that used to be an egg and chucked It at Talon. "SQUAKK!" the cucoo. Talon suddenly jolted awake. "What in tarnation! Can't a guy get a little shut eye around here!" Link got up and walked over to him. "Are you Talon?" Talon puffed out his chest. "Yep, I'm Talon, owner of Lon Lon Ranch." I got up and turned to him. "Well, Mr. Owner of Lon Lon Ranch, Malon's been waiting for you for a day now. Talon's eye's widened. "WHAT! Malon's been looking for me? Oh, I'm gonna get it from her now, making her wait for me!" Then he ran away screaming.

We stared after him. "OOOOkay…." I said. Link shrugged and started dragging the milk crates over to the moat. I looked at him in mock amazement. "Wow, you actually know what to do! I'm amazed!" Link rolled his eyes. "Please just help me." I shrugged and took care of the other crate. We both jumped over to the drain and crawled through.

We came out into the castle courtyard. I got up and stretched. "Man, I hate crawling. It makes my muscles cramp up." Link shrugged and was about to move on but I suddenly grabbed him. "Link, you idiot! There are still guards around here! Do you honestly believe that they would only put them outside the castle?" Link glared at me. "I know that! I was only going behind that bush to check how many guards are there!" I let go of him and laughed nervously. "Uh, sorry, my bad." So we started to sneak around the courtyard trying to be as sneaky as possible. Although you could almost walk right past them and they wouldn't notice, it was still possible to get caught. I almost did when I was going for some rupees but Link pulled me away before the guard noticed. Soon, we made it past security and came into the garden.

We walked in and saw a figure in a dress peeking through a window. (3 guesses who) Link went over to talk to her but I was looking through the other windows. I suddenly got an evil idea. "I wonder…" I said as I pulled out my slingshot and aimed at the left hand window. I shot at it and a guard peeked through the other side looking angry. "Hey you, don't cause trouble!" I fumed and then… He threw a bomb at me. "AAHHH!" I screamed and ducked and covered as the bomb went off. I was still a little to close and lost a quarter of a heart. "Bastard." I mumbled angrily.(Yes, you can actually do that in the game. Try it! It's funny!) Link stared at me and shook his head. The girl turned around as she heard the explosion and gasped. "Who?" We turned to look at her. "Who are you two? How did you get past the guards? And are those…" She looked at Navi and Twinkle. "Fairies?"

"Ding, ding, ding! You are correct!" I said in a game show host voice. She looked at me strangely but then continued. "Then are you both from the forest?" Link nodded and I gave a little shrug. She started to get excited. "Then would either of you happen to have the spiritual stone of the forest, would you? That green and shining stone… Do you have it?" We both nodded and she laughed in glee. "Just as I thought! I had a dream about it." I raised my eyebrow in mock interest. "A dream you say?" She took no notice and just nodded. "Yes, in it, dark clouds were billowing over Hyrule. Until a green and blue light shot out of the forest and two figured emerged. One holding a green and shining stone and the other holding three small flames that were red, blue and green." Now I was interested for real. I haven't heard about that one before. Three flames? What's she talking about? "Yes, I thought you two might be the ones." She said.

"So," Link spoke up. "What's your name? Oh my god. This guy is really dense. "Oh, I'm sorry!" The girl said. "I was so caught up in my rambling; I didn't even properly introduce myself. I am Zelda, princess of Hyrule." Wow what a BIG surprise. Zelda looked at us inquiringly. "What are your names? Link cleared his throat. "My name is Link. And the crazy person over there is Catherine." I glared at him. "Hey!" Zelda looked thoughtful. "Strange. Those names sound…Familiar. Okay then, Link and Catherine! I'm going to tell you about the legend of the sacred realm and the temple of time." Here we go, another long story. Blah, blah, blah, Sacred realm, blah, blah, blah, evil heart, blah, blah, blah, sages! After she was done Link said, "So that means that the Temple of Time…" Zelda nodded. "That's right. The temple of time is the entrance to the sacred realm. But it is guarded with a stone wall called the door of time. You need the three spiritual stones to open it. And another thing you also need is the royal family's treasure, the Ocarina of Time!"

I wasn't really paying much attention to this, cause I already heard it before. "Oh, I almost forgot," Zelda said moving aside. "I was spying through this window. The dark clouds in my dream… I believe they symbolize that man in there!" She pointed to the window. Link and I both peeked through the window to see the ugliest human looking man in the entire game! Zelda spoke up. "Can you see the man with the evil eyes?" We both nodded. "That is Ganondorf. He's the leader of the gerudos that hail from the desert. Though he swears leigence to my father, I am sure he is not sincere." Suddenly Ganondorf looked over at us. Link quickly turned away. Zelda looked worried. "What happened? Did he see you?" I got an evil idea in my head and breathed on the window creating a fog like thing on it. Then I wrote a message with my finger on it that said: "You suck" I smiled and gave him a salute and turned away. "Now he defiantly saw us!" I said with an evil grin. Link looked like he was about to strangle me. Zelda placed a hand on Link's shoulder. "Calm down and don't worry. He doesn't have any idea what we're planning… Yet!

I looked at Zelda. "So, did you tell anyone about this?" Zelda sighed. "Yes. I told my father about my dream. However, he doesn't believe that it's a prophecy." Her face grew really sad. "Ganondorf will do anything to get his hands on the triforce. I believe he aims to conquer all of Hyrule. No, the entire world!" She turned to us with a pleading look. "We must not let Ganondorf get the triforce! Help me, please!" Link looked at me. "Sounds like there's a lot at stake here. I know I'm in." I punched a fist into my hand. "Hey, I'm not about to pass up a chance like this to kill GanonDORK!" Zelda gave a relieved smile. "Thank you!" She turned to look at some of the flowers in the garden.

"I…I am afraid. I have a feeling that man is going to destroy Hyrule. He has such terrifying power!" She turned back to us with a determined look on her face. "We must not let Ganondorf get the triforce! I'll protect the Ocarina of Time with all my power. He shall not have it! You two go find the other spiritual stones!" Zelda gasped as she remembered something and turned around and started writing something. "One more thing, take this letter. I'm sure it will be helpful to you both." She handed the letter to us. "Thank you, princess." Link bowed. "Yeah, you rock!" I said. Zelda looked confused. "I….Rock? Are you implying I'm a goron or something?" She said a little indignantly. "No, no." I said. "It means that your…nice." Zelda's indignant look disappeared. "Oh. Well, thank you."

Link was looking at a woman blocking the entrance to the courtyard. Zelda smiled at us. "My attendant will guide you out of the castle. Don't be afraid to talk to her." We nodded and walked over to her. She looked down at us. "I am Impa, attendant of Princess Zelda. Everything is exactly as the princess foretold. My role in the princesses dream was to teach you the song of the royal family. I looked up at Impa. "Strange, Zelda never mentioned you in her dream." Impa's eye's widened. "She didn't? But… But… I'm her attendant… She should tell other people about me!" I patted Impa on the back. "There, there." Impa straightened up. "Um, never mind. Link, I will teach you the song of the royal family!" She put her fingers to her lips and began to whistle Zelda's lullaby. Link took out his ocarina and played it too. I have to admit, it was a very pretty song.

I was a little disappointed when they stopped playing, but I was eager to set out on an adventure. Impa looked down at us. "If the castle guards find you, there will be trouble. Let me guide you out of the castle. She threw down a deku nut sort of thing, and before we knew it we were in Hyrule Field. Impa was looking out towards Kakariko Village. "You brave children. We must protect this beautiful land of Hyrule. You two must journey up Death Mountain and speak with the gorons. There, you will find the next spiritual stone." We both walked up next to her and looked up at Death Mountain. "On the foot of the mountain is Kakariko Village. It was where I was born and raised. You might want to stop there and talk to the villagers before you scale Death Mountain. Good luck." Impa said and threw another deku nut down. In a bright flash of light, she was gone.

"Well," Link said, "Let's head for Kakariko!" I turned to him. "No, we should go to Lon Lon Ranch first!" Link raised an eyebrow. "Why?" I stamped my foot down. "Because I wanna see the horsies!" Link looked annoyed. "What does that have to do with our quest?" I opened my mouth big to whine. "BUT I WANNA SEE THE HORSIES!" Link clamped his hands over his ears. "Okay, okay! Just stop whining!" I jumped for joy. "Yay!" And I ran off in the direction of Lon Lon Ranch with everyone else reluctantly trailing behind me.

666666666666

BoV- Well, that's another chapter done! And I'm still trying to figure out what's wrong with Link here.

Doctor- It seems he is suffering from brain damage due the constant beating over the head of a rubber chicken.

BoV- INUYASHA!

Inuyasha- What? (Hides chicken behind back)

Link- CHICKENS!

BoV- (Chases after Inu) REVIEW PLEASE!


	5. Chapter 5: Playing with the Horsies

BoV- YEAH! I GOT MY MASTER QUEST GAME! MY LIFE IS COMPLETE! (for now)

Link- What do you mean, for now?

BoV- Until I beat the game, and then I'll be waiting impatiently for Twilight Princess to come out. And aren't you supposed to be mentally ill?

Link- (Shrugs)

BoV- Anyway, I don't own OOT, or any of the Zelda games. So shoo! (Shoos away lawyers)

Lawyers- You win this time.

66666666666666

**Chapter 5: Playing with the Horsies and Lost Woods fun**

It took us about a day to reach Lon Lon Ranch and we had to camp out under the stars. I don't like camping under the stars. "AAAAAHHH! BACK, BONE HEADS BACK!" I yelled killing the advancing stalchildren. Navi woke up bleary eyed. "Are they still attacking us? Can't they just leave us alone?" Link and I shot Navi a death glare and continued to battle the on coming army. Then I just realized something. "Aw shoot, I'm such an idiot!" Link raised an eyebrow. "What else is new?" I shot a glare at him. "Well, stalchildren don't attack us when we're on a path! And we're standing right in front of one!" Link looked suspicious. "How do you know all these things anyway?" He asked. "Uh…… I'm…Familiar with the landscape?" I said nervously. Link didn't look convinced. "Look, just forget about it, ok?" I said annoyed as I killed the last stalchild and flopped down on the path. "Goodnight." I said grumpily. Link whispered to Twinkle. "What's her problem?" Twinkle just shrugged and settled down herself. Link sighed and lay down and watched the stars.

The next morning I woke up and saw Link's sleeping figure and got an evil idea in my head. I snuck up on him, leaned down, brought my face close to his ear, took a deep breath, aaaaaand…… "COCKADOODLEDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" I screamed as loud as I could into his ear. "WAAAAA!" Link screamed and shot up. He glared over at me as I whistled innocently. "What? The rooster was extra loud this morning." He continued to glare and threw a rock at me. "OW!" I yelled as the offensive object hit me in the head. "Meanie…" I muttered as we set off to Lon Lon Ranch. We got there by mid morning. I sighed contently. "Aaah, I love ranches. The clean air, the loving animals, and the fresh smell…. Of cow poo?" Link coughed in disgust while I just shrugged it off. Back where I live, My school's right across from a cow farm so I'm used to the scent.

My stomach started to growl suddenly. "Man, ever since I arrived in Hyrule, I never got anything to eat." I whined. Link shrugged. "Maybe if we ask nicely, Talon will give us some breakfast." I grinned. "I like the way you think, Link." I said patting him on the back. Link rolled his eyes. So, we went inside the house. Talon was snoozing while the cucoos were pecking him nonstop. I shushed Link and crept over to Talon. I took out my rupee bag and counted. 20 rupees should cover it. I thought while I set the money on Talon's lap and took a bottle of milk and one of the cucoos. Link glared at me when we went outside. "What's the matter with you! We can't steal!"

"We didn't steal!" I retorted. "I paid the guy 20 rupees didn't I?" Link looked angrier. "You can't give him 20 rupees while he's sleeping and walk away with a cucoo and a bottle of milk!" I glared at him. "And why not?" Link stormed back into the house. After a while, he came back out. And he looked at me. "Cause those are at least 40 rupees." He said as he pocketed his own rupee bag away. "Oh." I said. Then I brightened up. "Well, let's go see the horses!" I said with glee and skipped in a scary way towards the huge circular gate that held all the horses. Link just sighed and trudged behind me.

When we entered, we saw Malon singing her song. Two horses were standing next to her. One with a rich chestnut color and a white mane, and the other a chocolate brown color and a black mane. Malon looked up and stopped singing and waved at us happily. "Hey, Fairy boy and Fairy girl! Hi!" We both cringed at the names. "Uh, how are you doing, Malon?" I asked. "Just great!" she said. "Thanks for helping me out with my dad the other day. I gave him a suitable…Punishment…Hehehe.." She gave an evil little giggle but quickly caught herself and put on her big smile. I backed away scared. I don't remember Malon being like THAT in the game. But then I remembered Talon's fear while he heard she was looking for him. And… It looked like he had a third degree burn that wasn't there when he was at the castle. I got scared and hid behind Link.

I soon forgot my fear, however, when I was looking at the chocolate brown horse. She was so pretty. I reached out my hand to pet her, but… "OWW! SHE FREAKIN BIT ME!" I screamed in pain. Malon giggled. "It seems that Milako is afraid of you, Fairy Girl." I looked up from my wound. "Oh, Milako is her name?" I could never stay mad at a horse. It just isn't my way. Malon nodded and pointed to the chestnut colored horse. "And her name is Epona." When Link went toward Epona, she suddenly galloped off. Malon giggled even more at this. "I wonder if all my horses are afraid of you two," she laughed. "Fairy Boy, want me to teach you my mother's song? It should help Epona like you better."

"Sure, why not?" Link said while taking out his ocarina. While Malon sang, Link played along. Link learned Epona's song! Yay. I turned to Malon. "Anyway, how do I getMilako to like me more?" I asked. "Simple," Malon said. "And you don't even need a song, either!" She took a deep breath and shouted: "DAISYCAKEMILK!" Milako came running up to her. Malon looked over at me. "Now you try it!" I nodded a little weirded out, but I decided to try it anyway. "DAISYCAKEMILK!" I shouted. Milako came trampling to me… And over me too. Link and Malon winced as I was lying on the ground. I got up and brushed myself off. "Well, shall we go, then?" I said waving to Malon and started to somewhat limp away. Link said goodbye to Malon and followed after me.

At Hyrule Field, well, lets just say our cucoo friend met an untimely end and we were later munching on some fried chicken. "So," Link said swallowing a bite of his food. "Should we head to Kakariko now?" "Not yet." I said. "First, we have to see Saria." Link looked annoyed. "Why? Impa told us to go to Kakariko!" I crossed my arms. "Because I said so!" Link glared. "You're not the boss around here!" I rolled my eyes. "Trust me. I know what I'm talking about." Link got up and started to walk in the other direction. "Forget it. I'm going to Kakariko." I cracked my knuckles and advanced towards him. "Well, I guess I'm going to have to do this the hard way then."

666666666666666666

A few hours later, I was walking happily to Kokiri Forest with Link stuffed in a bag that I found in Hyrule field. Link was muttering curses that were muffled in the bag. Navi and Twinkle were flying along trying to keep as much distance away from me as possible. As we entered Kokiri Forest, Link finally cut himself out of the bag with his sword and hit me in the head with his slingshot again. "IF YOU DO ANYTHING LIKE THAT AGAIN, I PROMISE YOU THAT THE NEXT DEKU SEED I FIRE WILL GET LODGED IN YOUR SKULL!" I was rubbing the lump on my forehead. "Sheesh, and I thought you were the quiet, non-violent type. But I guess you're just a deku seed-happy idiot." Link sighed angrily. Forget it, just come on!

We went into the Lost Woods and wandered around for a while. Ugh, if only I could remember which way to go! But I didn't. So, we got lost a lot. "AGH!" Link yelled as we ended up in the beginning area yet again. "If my memory serves right, we should go… That way." I said and pointed forward. We trudged through the log but… Ended up in the beginning area. "Shoot!" I said. And usually, I have photographic game memory. "HOOOOOT! It looks like you're looooooooost!" We all turned our heads, and to our horror… KP was perched on the right side log. (I'm just using KP from now on cause Kaepora Gaebora is too long) I nodded fearfully. "Weeeeeell, all you haaaaave to do is listen to the souuuunds of the forest! Let thaaaat be your guide! Toodles!" And with that, KP flew away.

"Sounds of the forest? What the heck does that mean?" Link asked. Then suddenly, my brain started to work again! I listened closely, and sure enough, I heard Saria's song playing on the right log. "Come on!" I said pulling Link through the log. From that point onward, we just used our ears and followed wherever the music was playing. Eventually, we came to the Sacred Forest Meadow. Link walked ahead, but then I remembered what was guarding the entrance to the gate. "Link, wait a second!" I shouted, but it was too late. A gigantic Wolfos popped out of the ground and started attacking Link. "Woah!" Link yelled as he did a backflip. He thrust at it with his sword, but it just backflipped away. I got an idea and ran in front of it. "Hey, Fur-butt! Over here!" The Wolfos growled and started to advance towards me. Link took that opportunity and started slashing like there was no tomorrow. Soon, the Wolfos crumpled and died and the gate slid open so we could enter the maze.

We didn't run into anything too dangerous along the way except for a few Mad Scrubs. I got a few boo-boos from that. Waaaaaa! (Ahem) Sorry. Anyway, soon we went up the final set of stairs and found Saria sitting on a log and playing her ocarina. When she noticed us she stopped and looked up. "I've been waiting for you, Link." I crossed my arms. "Ahem!" Saria glanced at me. "Oh, and you too, Catherine." Then she turned back to Link. "This is the Sacred Forest Meadow. It's my secret place! I feel… This place will be very important to all three of us someday, that's what I feel." Link looked confused and I pretended to look surprised. I already knew what she was talking about, of course. "If you play the ocarina here, you can talk with the spirits in the forest." Saria continued. "Would you like to play the ocarina with me?" Link nodded and took out his ocarina.

Saria giggled. "Okay. Try to follow along with the melody I will play. Are you ready?" She put the ocarina to her lips and started to play. Link followed along shakily at first, but soon he mastered the melody. It was nice to hear the two of them play together. It's as if the song was made for them. I kinda felt a twinge of jealousy, but I shook it off. As the two finished, Saria giggled with joy. "Great, great! Please don't forget this song. Do you promise?" Link nodded as he put his own ocarina away. Saria smiled. "When you want to hear my voice, play Saria's song. You can talk with me anytime!" Link nodded. "Well, we better get going. Come on Catherine." He said. We both waved to Saria and set off.

As we were walking through the Lost Woods Link spoke up. "So, where are we going now? Gerudo Valley? Lake Hylia? Or any other place we don't need to go?" I shook my head. "No, we're going to Kakariko." Link's eyes widened. "Really? We're actually going?" I nodded. "Finally! We're back on track! Nothing could possibly spoil this moment!" But unfortunately, Link was wrong. "HOOOOOT! Did you meet with Saria?" Link and I looked at each other in horror. "WHAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" We both screamed.

66666666666666666666

BoV- Finally, this chapter is finished! It took me forever to do! And I'm sorry for the long update! First of all, it was half my fault that I was so lazy, and second, this story was taken down because I did something wrong and I couldn't reupload it for a while.

Link- GO Shut up Link. I Anyway, please review!


	6. Chapter 6: Kakariko Graves and Chicken R

BoV- Sorry for the long update people! I haven't been in direct range of a comp because I went to New York City for a week.

Link- You've had your comp other times!

BoV- Well, that's because….

Link- Because you're lazy, right?

BoV- YES ITS TRUE! I'M A LAZY SLOB! (Cries)

Link- (rolls eyes) Anyway, BoV doesn't own OOT or any of the Zelda games.

6666666666666666666

**Chapter 6: Kakariko Graves and Chicken Rodeos**

It was peaceful and quiet in kokiri forest. The kokiri children were playing without a care in the world. That is, until they heard two screams from the lost woods. Link and I ran out of the lost woods screaming our heads off running from KP. We leaned against a tree stump home panting. "That… Was… Close" I panted. "Yeah…" Link wheezed. "We… Just… Avoided… Evil… Rambling…" Twinkle flew up into the sky and came back down. "No sign of him. Let's make a break for it!" We both nodded and ran out of the forest as fast as we could with all the kokiri staring at us.

"FREAKS!" Mido called after us. Navi and Twinkle flew back to Mido for a second to sprinkle "Fairy dust" in a threatening manner. Mido gave a quick eep and ran back into his house. Navi and Twinkle hi-fived and flew after us. In Hyrule Field we were running to Kakariko Village when night suddenly fell. Link sighed. "Well looks like we'll have to camp here for the night. I nodded and we both lay down on the path to avoid evil stalchildren. Suddenly, I felt my stomach rumbling. "Shoot, we don't have anything to eat." Link sighed. "Maybe we can get something in Kakariko."

"But I can't wait that long!" I whined. Link glared at me. "Goodnight." He then turned over and fell asleep. I sighed. "Is he immune to hunger or something?" Twinkle shrugged. "I am." She said. I stared at Twinkle like she was crazy. Eventually, we all fell asleep. The next morning, we set back off to Kakariko. We actually made it still pretty early in the morning. "Wow, what a peaceful looking village." Navi sighed flying around. Link spotted a bazaar close by. "Hey, Catherine, I'm going to go shopping for some supplies, ok?"

"Ok, lets go!" I said. "NO! I mean, why don't you go explore or something?" Link said nervously. I narrowed my eyes. "Fine, but you will pay," I growled as I walked away. "Someone's in a bad mood," Twinkle said in a annoying singsong voice. "SHUT UP!" I said and slapped her. "It's because I'm starved ok!"

"Ok, ok, sheesh," Twinkle mumbled. Suddenly, we both heard a cry of distress. "What was that?" Twinkle shouted alarmed. "It's coming from over there!" I said pointing up a small flight of stairs. We climbed up the stairs, turned right, and came upon a lady in front of an empty chicken coop. Twinkle flew up to the lady. "What's the matter?" The lady suddenly started sobbing. "I lost all my cucoos!" I rolled my eyes. Oh yeah, the chicken lady.

She pointed to me. "You! Little girl! Go find them!" I crossed my arms. "Nothing doing, lady. Not in the mood." The lady suddenly pulled out a bow and arrow and aimed at me. "I think I wasn't clear." I laughed nervously. "Anyway, as I was saying, I'll go get those cucoos for you." And with that, I picked up the nearest cucoo and threw it in it's pen. "Stupid lady," I muttered as I collected the cucoo near the gate to Death Montain. "Hey, look on the bright side." Twinkle said as we tossed the cucoo into the pen. "We might get something good for our adventure out of this." I rolled my eyes. "Just a stinking empty… OWWW!" The cucoo I was reaching for near the entrance to Kakariko pecked my hand. "WHY YOU LITTLE!" I was about to throw it to the ground when I heard an arrow being pulled back in a bow. I looked up and saw chicken lady aiming her arrow at me again. "I mean. GOOD LITTLE BIRD!" I said in a sickengly sweet voice and petting it.

Eventually we got all the cucoos back in their pen. "Thank you so much!" The chicken lady said bouncing up and down. "I'm allergic to cucoos and I get goosebumps whenever I touch them. "What's the point of owning them, then?" I asked. Chicken lady raised her bow. "But then again, you can always take some medicine for that," I said nervously. "Anyway, take this. It's made of fine glass, so be careful with it!" She tossed me a glass bottle. "Thank you." I said with a fake cheesy grin and walked away.

"Wow, that was worth my time." I said sarcastically. "Aw, come on, it's not that bad," Twinkle said. I showed her my hands which were bloody and scratched from the cucoos. "Oooh…" Twinkle said wincing. Link then came running up to us. "Hey, I got some useful stuff and food!" He said holding up a pack which probably had food in it. "You know what I got?" I said angrily. Link looked frightened. "I GOT A BLOODY AND SCRATCHED PAIR OF HANDS AND A LOUSY STINKING BOTTLE!" And with that I chucked the bottle at him and stormed off towards the graveyard. Link stood there dumbstruck. "What in blazes is her problem?" Twinkle whispered in Link's ear, "She had a bad experience with cucoos." Link winced.

Meanwhile, I was just leaning off the royal family's grave blowing off some steam. "Man, I hate that cucoo lady! Link got the easy job! ARGH!" I kicked a grave next to me. And a poe came out of it! (BUM BUM BUM!) "EEK!" I yelled and swung my sword at it until it became nothing but a little flame thing. It squeaked. "Forgive me for attacking you! I am one of the composer brothers!" Then he told me all about the magical song and everything else he had to say (Can't remember) and then he disappeared. "Catherine!" Link yelled as he entered the graveyard. "Oh, hey, Link," I said grumpily.

"Now what's your problem?" Link asked. "Oh nothing, except that I WAS RECENTLY ATTACKED BY A POE!" I shouted. Twinkle shook her head. "This just isn't your day, is it?"

"Hey, what's this?" Link asked walking up to the triforce dirt mark in front of the royal family grave. "Uh, nothing," I said nervously as I backed away. I sure as heck didn't want to go in that creepy grave. Link pulled out his ocarina and played Zelda's lullaby. "NOOOOOOO!" I yelled trying to stop him but it was to late and the tombstone blew up. "Wow, cool!" Link yelled and jumped in. "No wait!" I yelled. Twinkle sighed. "If you don't want to go in there, you don't have to." I clenched my fists. "But I have to! Because if I don't, the creepy zombies down there will eat Link and Navi's brain!" And with that, I ju,mped into the grave after Link and Navi with Twinkle following after me.

Inside the grave, I saw a bunch of dead Keese lying around. "Looks like Link took care of this room which means… HE'S IN THE ZOMBIE ROOM!" I yelled and sprinted through the next door. As soon as I entered, an unbearable smell reached my nose. "Ugh!" I exclaimed as I held my nose. "Smells like a dead mouse only ten times worse!" Twinkle fell to the ground twitching. I cautiously stepped into the room and immediately found Link frozen in spot with a zombie slowly approached him. "Hey, stay away from my idiot!" I yelled and threw a deku nut at it and it froze in place because of the light it created. (I don't know if that strategy actually works, but you can try it if you are feeling bold. Whahaha!) I ran over to Link who was still frozen. "Link, snap out of it, you dolt!" I yelled slapping him across the face.

"OW!" Link yelled putting a hand to the slap mark on his face. "Good, you can move again now COME ON!" I yelled dragging him into the next part of the room. Link smiled. "Uh, thanks for saving me. But did you have to slap me across the face?" I laughed nervously. "Sorry, it was the only thing I could think of at the time." Link rolled his eyes, but then we heard some very scary groans coming from outside the room. "EEK, they're coming, and we're trapped in here!" I yelled. I then spotted the huge tablet with the poem and the sung song on it. "HeyLink, look!Their's a song go learn it and ignore the poem! HURRY!" I yelled pushing him towards the tablet. Link quickly reached into the pack that he recently bought and pulled up his ocarina.

He quickly played the sun's song. The redeads froze in place. "Okgreatnowletsrightitdownsowedontforgetit!" I dove into Link's pack and pulled out a piece of paper and a quill pen. (I don't know what they use to right with in the game they never tell you! So I'm gonna go with the quill) I quickly scribbled down the notes of the song and we all ran out before the redeads could wake up. We quickly stepped into the pretty light and ended up in the graveyard. I sighed and flopped down. "That was too close, right Link?" Link didn't answer. "Link?" I asked sitting up. "Catherine, did you notice that it's suddenly night, but it was afternoon when we entered the grave and we were only in there for a few minutes."

"Huh?" I looked up. Indeed it was night. "Oh yeah, that's what happens when you play the sun's song." Link looked confused. Then suddenly a guy came up to me and hit me with a shovel. "HEY, NO MESSING WITH THE GRAVES!"

"Owie…" It was like being hit in the head with a slingshot, but only ten times worse. And I lost 1 ½ hearts. "Sorrrryyyyy.." I said while looking at the pretty stars dancing in front of my eyes. I shook my head and realized that the dude who hit me was none other than Dampe, the grave keeper. "Would you two like to play my heart pounding grave digging tour? Ten rupees for one hole."

"Sure," Link said and handed over ten rupees. "Man, how big is that wallet of yours?" Link shrugged as Dampe began to dig a hole. "Congratulations, you get a heart piece!" Dampe said handing it to Link. "Awesome!" Link said as it sunk into him giving him a boost. "Hey!" I handed ten rupees to Dampe from my own wallet. "Diga hole for me too,please." Dampe pocketed the rupees and started digging. "Congratulations, you got a worm!" Dampe said tossing it at me. "AAAAAHHHHH! GETITOFFGETITOFFGETITOFFFFFFF!" I yelled running around in circles. Twinkle plucked the worm off it and threw it onto the ground.

Link sighed. "Anyway, we better find a place to stay and decent food to eat, because we have to trek up Death Mountain tomorrow." I nodded. "Right, I think I saw an inn nearby." We left the graveyard and entered the nearby inn. A smiling lady at the counter looked down at us. "Well, hello little children! Where are your parents?"

"Uh, they're on a business trip," I lied. "Can we please have a room to stay in and a nice meal?" The lady smiled even wider. "Why, of course you can! All you need is ten rupees each!" Link reached into his wallet. "Shoot, I'm out of cash!"

"It's ok, don't sweat it Link," I said pulling out my own wallet. "You bought everything else today." Link smiled. "Thanks." I blushed a little until I heard two annoying giggles behind me. I turned around and saw Navi and Twinkle laughing at us. I growled and swatted the two pests away. "Shut it."

A little later, we were in our rooms pigging out on the food that we were given. "I haven't tasted anything so good since the fried cucoo!" I said happily with my mouth full. Link nodded. "Yeah because it's actually cooked right! Instead of the burned slop you made!"

"Hey!" I said. "I'm not used to cooking without a cookbook!" Link rolled his eyes. "Whatever," He said finishing up. "Well, we better get to sleep. We have a big day tomorrow." I nodded finishing off my own dinner. "Yeah, good idea." I got into my bed and closed my eyes. It felt so nice not to be sleeping in a real bed. Not quite my bed, but it was better than sleeping on the ground. Speaking of my bed I wondered if I would ever be able to be able to sleep in my own bed again. Or laze around the house again. I was even beginning to miss torturous workouts of swim team. Well, not really. Ah well, all I needed to do was complete the game, and I played it a thousand times before, so it should be easy, right? Later I would find out that I was indeed WRONG!

66666666666666

BoV- So what did you think? I know Kakariko doesn't have an inn, or doesn't get a bazaar until the adult part of the game, but when I'm sucked into the game, things are bigger and more realistic than in the game, so Kakariko is a bit bigger.

Link- Do you think people actually care?

BoV- Hey, you never know! People might want to know!

Inuyasha- Can I have my ramen yet?

BoV- Oh, no not you again. Anyway please review and tell me what you think!


	7. Chapter 7: Scaling Death Mountain

BoV- Ok, I just had sugar, has LoZ stuck in my head, listening to Spamalot soundrack, and I'm wearing sunglasses. I think I'm ready to update.

Link- OH GODDESSES, NOT SUGAR!

BoV- (laughs like a maniac)

Link- Birth of Venus does not own OOT or any of the Zelda games.

666666666666666

**Chapter 7: Scaling Death Mountain **

I woke up with the sun shining bright in my face and the smell of eggs and sausage. I slowly opened my eyes and saw a huge orb of light right in my face. Wait, that was Twinkle. "AAAAAAAAAHHH!" I yelled bolting upright sending Twinkle flying. Wait. She could already fly. I yawned and rubbed my eyes. "What time is it?" Link was already up looking frustrated. "its 10:30 according to the gossip stone over there," he said pointing to the stone in the corner of the room.

"I guess that's what you people use to tell time," I said to myself. Link glared at me. "What do you mean, you people?" Oops. He heard me! "Uh…Oh, look, breakfast!" I said nervously trying to change the subject. I took my plate and wolfed down my breakfast. I grabbed our pack and lifted it up on my shoulders. "Anyway, let's get going!" I said and raced out of the room. Link and the fairies followed not long afterward. We stopped to thank the innkeeper and left for the gate that would lead up to Death Mountain.

I walked up to the guard and puffed out my chest in an important manner. "Hello, we would like to climb Death Mountain. Please lower the gate! The guard took one look at me and burst out laughing. "Yeah right, you're just a stupid kid who can't even read yet!" I glared up at him. "Listen bub, I've been reading since I first entered kindergarten! I've read classic literature! I CAN EVEN READ JAPANESE! No, wait, no I can't. But that's beside the point! So I can read a stupid sign!"

"Besides, we have a note from Princess Zelda," Link said handing the note to the guard. The guard took the note and read it out loud: "This is Link and Catherine. They are going to save Hyrule." The guard burst out laughing. "Wahahaha! What kind of game has our princess come up with this time? Fine, then "Mr. and Mrs. Hero, I'll let you two pass!" I glared. "Dude, that's sick. I am NOT Link's "Mrs." Got that!"

"Aw, how cute," the guard said patting me on the head. I grinned. "Hey, they say that if your hand is bigger than your head, you have a plague."

"Really?" The guard said and brought his hand in front of his face. I quickly whipped out my slingshot and shot it right into the back of his hand which not only brought his hand crashing into his nose out of the sheer force of the deku seed, but it also left a nasty bruise that was beginning to form at the back of his hand. "Run Link!" I yelled running up the trail. Link stared after me. The guard looked as angry as hell, about to bear down on Link. "Uh, wait for me, Catherine!" Link yelled sprinting up the trail after me.

Link quickly caught up with me and we started our trek up Death Mountain trail. After about a half hour, we reached a cave with a huge boulder blocking it. Next to it, we saw a goron sleeping next to it. I took a tiny rock and tapped the goron on the back with it. The goron yawned and unrolled and got up. "Hey, I'm a goron!" I rolled my eyes. "Yeah, I kinda figured that out. Link walked up to the goron. "What's this cave for?"

"That's the Dodongo's Cavern. It's where we gorons eat our rocks." Link looked weirded out. "Uh… Rocks?" The goron nodded. "Unfortunately, the entrance to the cavern is blocked by this boulder. If you want to hear more goron gossip, head up to my village. You should be able to reach it by nightfall if you continue up this path." We said are goodbyes and continued our trek.

Link seemed to be thinking. "I wonder how that cavern got blocked off." I scowled. "I think that GanonDORK poked his big green nose into the goron's business." Link nodded. "Sounds like something he would do. A tektite suddenly jumped in front of us. "EEEK!" I yelled. "EVIL SPIDER THINGY!" I jump attacked it and slashed it to pieces. Link sighed. "Another one? This place is crawling with Tektites!" He slashed another one coming from behind. "Lets just get to Goron City as fast as we can!" We killed a few more tektites and continued up the mountain.

Suddenly a goron suddenly came rolling down at high speeds. Link ran out of the way. "Catherine, move it!" I looked up from looking at the ground. (as you can tell, I have attention issues) "Huh?" But it was too late. The goron knocked me over and I flew off the edge. Luckily, I managed to grab on to the edge before I could fall into the endless abyss of doom! But there was the problem that I wasn't very good at holding on to things, so I was about to fall! OO

"WAAAAAHHHH!" I screamed trying to get back up. Link ran up to me. "Give me your hand!" he said reaching his own hand out. I glared up at him. "Are you insane! If I let go with even one of my hands, I'll fall!"

"Well, your gonna fall anyway if you keep hanging on like that!" I looked at my hands. He was right! My hands were quickly slipping. "Okay okay!" I let go with one hand and quickly grabbed Link's. He grunted with a bit of effort trying to pull me up, but eventually, I managed to make it up safely. We were both leaning against a rocky wall panting. I decided to break the silence. "Uh, thanks for saving me," I said a blush quietly creeping across my face. Link rubbed the back of his head with a blush of his own. "Ah, it was nothing."

"But it was something! If you hadn't pulled up, I would have been a pancake!" Link laughed. "I guess your right." I suddenly got up. "Well then, shall we continue?" Link nodded. We hiked up the mountain until we came to the entrance of Goron City. By the time we got there, the sun had already set. Link headed toward the entrance. "Well, you coming?" I flopped down. "I'd rather go night-night." Link rolled his eyes. "You can go night-night after we get that spiritual stone." I crossed my arms. "NOOOOOOOOO! I DON'T WANNA!" I whined. Link sighed and grabbed me by my braid and dragged me inside.

Man, if I thought Goron City was big in the game, I got a whole new perspective of bigness when we entered it. "Helloooooo…" I called to no one in particular just to hear the echo. I heard it sound again and again waking many gorons from their sleep. Link gave me a glare. The nearest goron came up to us rubbing his eyes. "Hello, may I help you?" Link nodded. "Yeah, we're looking for the spiritual stone of fire. The goron looked puzzled. "Spiritual… Stone? What's that?" I went up to him. "The big shiny red stone."

A look of realization came across the goron's face. "Oh… Well, it would be found over there." He said pointing to the small pedestal hanging in midair because it was tied to ropes "But Big Brother Darunia took it away into his room." Link raised an eyebrow. "Why would he do that?" To answer his question, a large rumbling slightly shook the city. Navi flew out of Link's hat angrily. "Hey, what's going on out here! I was sleeping!" The goron slightly blushed. "Sorry, our whole race is starving because of our rock shortage from the Dodongo's Cavern. It has the greatest gourmet rocks." I raised one eyebrow. "Why not eat the rocks around you? You're surrounded by them!" The goron sighed. "We would, but we gorons are such picky eaters, we won't eat rocks anywhere else!" He sighed again. "I want to eat sirloin rocks from the Dodongo's Cavern.

As we were walking away Navi grumbled. "If they're starving, then wouldn't they eat the rocks here just to feed themselves? I looked up at her. "Be quiet so we can do a good deed." Navi grumbled and flew back into Link's hat.

Eventually, we reached the bottom floor. "So, where do you think Darunia's room is?" I asked playing dumb. Link pointed to the big stone door with the goron symbol painted on it. "I think that's it." I rolled my eyes. "Wow, what a brain buster." Link glared at me and walked over to the door and knocked. "You're not going to get in like that," a voice said behind us. We turned around and saw another goron standing behind us. Link raised an eyebrow. "Oh, really? Then how are we going to get in?" I shook my head. How dense can you get? But then a little voice in my head reminded me that it took me forever to figure out how to get through the first time I played.

The goron scratched his head. "Well, big brother only lets in messengers of the royal family, so unless you're them, you're out of luck." Link nodded. "Well, I think I know what we have to then."

"One more thing," the goron said stopping us. "Big Brother Daruina also like anything to do with the forest." We both nodded and headed over to the door. Link pulled out his ocarina and started playing Zelda's Lullaby. Soon, the door started to shake violently and slowly opened. "Well, let's go!" I said and went through the door with Link following close behind me.

We went through the dark passage and came through into a brightly lit room with a bunch of tapestry and cloth. It almost looked homely. In the middle of the room stood a goron more muscular then the rest, had large white spiky hair, and a stern look that would make a professional wrestler run home crying to his mommy. This was Darunia. (duh!)

Darunia glared down at us. "What is this! When I heard the song of the Royal Family, I thought that it would be their messengers! But, you two are just kids! Is this is how Darunia, leader of the gorons, is treated by his sworn brother the king!" I raised my hands in self defense. "Hey, what's your problem?" Darunia seemed to explode. "What's my problem? WHAT'S MY PROBLEM! EVIL DODONGOS HAVE INVADED THE DODONGO'S CAVERN,"

"Well, it is the DODONGO'S Cavern," I whispered to Link. He just glared at me and turned to continue to listen to Darunia's wrath. "GORONS ARE FACING STARVATION, AND TO TOP IT ALL OFF, YOU BRATS ARE ANNOYING THE HECK OUT OF ME!" We both backed away in fear. "But… THIS IS A GORON PROBLEM! WE DON'T NEED BRATS LIKE YOU!"

I whispered into Link's ear. "Hey, play Saria's song." Link looked at me puzzled. "How's that gonna help us?" I glared. "Just do it!" Link rolled his eyes. "Fine, fine." He got out his ocarina and started playing. Almost instantly, Darunia's look of anger melted into a look of wild contempt. Suddenly he started to dance like a rabid baboon. We both backed away farther. Twinkle shivered. "I think I liked him better when he was angry." We both nodded in agreement.

Darunia eventually stopped dancing and looked at us with a huge smile on his face. "Ah, what a great song. When I heard it, it seemed all my troubles went away. Anyway, what did you two come for?" Link stepped forward a little nervously. "Um, well, we came here for the spiritual stone of fire." Darunia's eyes widened. "The spiritual stone? It's the ancient treasure passed down from generation to generation in the goron race."

"Great, so can we have it?" I asked. Darunia shook his head. "I'm not going to give the spiritual stone to you two that easily! If you want the stone so badly, why not destroy the creatures in the Dodongo's Cavern. I groaned inwardly. I knew that was coming but I was hoping maybe this time, Darunia would just hand the stone over. But alas, if he did that, the game would be too easy. Link looked at me. "Well? You up for a trip to Dodongo's Cavern?" I sighed and nodded. "I guess we don't have a choice." Darunia clapped his hands together. (which shook the whole room) "Great! I also want to give you two a gift for helping us out! With these, even little kids like you can pick up our special crop, the bomb flower!" With that, he handed both of us a pair of golden power bracelets.

Darunia frowned. "Although, it is pretty late. Would you two like to spend the night? We've got the most comfortable rock beds! We both shook our heads nervously. "Uh, we'll just sleep outside." Darunia shrugged. "Suit yourselves."

Outside the entrance to goron city, we unrolled the mats that Link got in Kakariko and ate a dinner of bread and potatoes. A very strange meal indeed, but I have very strange tastes. After we finished eating, we put the fire out and climbed onto our mats. I yawned. "Man, this adventuring is hard work! When I get home, I am so gonna break out the potato chips and the computer!" Link looked at me funny. "What are you talking about?" I sighed. "Never mind," I slowly closed my eyes and went to sleep dreaming about scary dinosaurs tap-dancing. Unfortunately, my dream was about to come true in the morning. Cut out the tap-dancing.

66666666666666666666

BoV-So what did you think? Sorry for the long update, but I'm on vacation at the moment, so I don't have much time to write.

Link- I hope you get less and less time, so you can't update at all.

BoV- Shut up Link. Anyway, please review!


End file.
